In honor of my birthday earlier this week, I am re-posting this smart and cheeky article in praise of dating older women from the OkCupid.com blog:
I am not so old as to be outside the date-able range for men in their 20s (Dr. F and I are 3.5 years apart), but when we first began dating, Dr. F was at the tender age of 19, our relationship was considered shocking by both his peers and mine. This was before Ashton and Demi made dating older women trendy. Today women such as myself can proudly bear the cool yet cuddly moniker "cougar," but back then I was simply known as "cradle robber."
At the time, Dr. F was still in college, without a job and without a car, and living in a different county. Seeing him meant driving up to an hour and half in southern California traffic on weekends, sharing a full bed in his dorm with a snoring roommate a couple of feet away, and schlepping a toiletries basket to the communal shower. And the prospect of doing so for 3 years until Dr. F graduated. The less supportive among my friends and family saw this as "degrading" myself. I was a college graduate beginning a career. In their eyes, I should have been dating someone my age or older with solid career prospects immediately on the horizon and working towards marriage and family as soon possible. They figured a young college guy would not be able to make a serious commitment, no matter how fond he might be of me. He would want to date around or at least find a girlfriend who could take part in his day-to-day comings and goings. He would want someone he could bring to his frat keggers on Thursday nights, share meals with in the dining hall, and study with during finals.
Many of his friends and family, surprisingly, felt that he should or would want these things too. They figured that his interest was momentary and he would quickly give up the complications of a semi-long distance romance with an older woman with a settled lifestyle once he realized how much fun he could be having with any number of the many doe-eyed young ladies at his large state college. Or they believed that I would eventually tire of my boy toy who could not possibly meet my adult needs and wants and move on to an older man.
But fortunately for us, they were all wrong. :)
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Welcome to the ongoing chronicle of my wedding planning adventures/madness! I am getting wedding-ed to my (male) partner of 5+ years this October. Between observations of already married friends and media hype, I am gathering that putting together this one event will require: a) the organization skills of a project manager, b) the social graces of Miss Manners, c) an excellent sense of humor, d) a very thick skin, and e) a big wad of cash. I think I've got (or can acquire in six months) a) - d), but am sorely lacking e). Watch me thumb my nose at the wedding industrial complex and have a fabulous wedding anyway.